Saturday, October 4, 2014

Tough week

Today I felt the full effects of what running does for me.  Running is truly my “go to” coping skill when dealing with what comes my way.  I had a very tough week.  Monday I went out for a run (which was awesome).  Wednesday I did not feel like running and bailed on my running buddy (this is not like me).  I did this early enough so my running buddy wasn’t left by themselves at our meeting place.  I was having GI distress and I’m thinking that was related to the anxiety I was feeling.  Then I didn’t go out Thursday because I was planning to do my long run on Friday.  Meanwhile I had been sleeping in more than usual.  So on Thursday night I had a really difficult evening of counseling (clients were tough and draining and I wasn’t in my best state of mind).    I forgot to turn my alarm to “on” when I went to bed (it was set for 5am, but I didn’t turn it on).  This made me very sad because I woke up naturally at about 6:15am ish and I realize that my running buddy would have been waiting for me.  Fortunately I have amazing friends and they cut me some slack this week.

Anyway, to make a long story longer I didn’t really feel like running this morning either.  The crazy part is that I had 7 on the schedule and I’ve run 23 miles in the recent past.  Seven miles isn’t what was holding me back.  I decided that I would convince myself just to get out the door.  I told my wife that I’d run either 1, 3, 5, or 7 miles this morning.  I knew that if I could just get out the door I would run the full 7 miles.   I did run the full 7 miles and it was cool because I ran a loop that connected what I typically do on a weekday morning with friends and I just started from my house.  It worked perfectly and I feel much more “human.”

Bottom line:  If I’m feeling “out of sorts” I typically just need to go out for a run and that will “reset” my emotions.  Obviously this does not work in every single situation, but it works fairly well.

Ok, here's my facebook, email rant if you want to read it :-).

Now, I want to say outloud what I’ve been thinking about social media.  I haven’t checked my email or facebook at all today and it is already 4:11pm.  This is unheard of in my life.  The interesting twist is that we just announced that Cindy is going to be having our second child in May 2015.  This would typically be an excuse to check facebook about a million times.  I haven’t.  This has been very challenging, but it shows me how much I have depended on social media as my interactions with others. 

Yesterday I did minimal checking of email (3 times or so) and checked facebook at least twice if not three times.  I felt disconnected from people.  It was weird because I wouldn’t normally have a ton of social interactions on a Friday, but because I wasn’t checking facebook and “keeping in touch” with my friends I felt disconnected.  This has shown me that I want to take my own advice more and call people.  I want to use what I learn from Facebook to spur on conversation rather than replace it.

Not sure if this all makes sense, but what I am saying is this… Facebook and email is great, but it can’t be the only way for me to interact with others.  It provides a “fake” closeness that I personally have grown “addicted” to in my life (as proven in the last few days). 

I’m not saying that anyone else needs to change the way they use email and facebook, but these last 24 + hours have taught me a ton.

Have a great day!